A message from Ronnie:

Losing someone to suicide is one of life's most shocking and painful traumas.  When the loss is new, it's hard to know how you will get through the next hour, much less the next day, week or year.

When my stepson Channing took his life at 21, I was unprepared for the roller coaster of emotions that followed.  Within three months, my marriage ended and I entered a period of despair in which life no longer held joy. I was frightened and angry.  I felt guilty and powerless.  My sense of possibility and desire to participate in the world around me were gone. I was numb, obsessed with thoughts and emotions related to the suicide, wondering -- even two years later -- if I would ever feel moved, inspired, joyful or powerful again.

Many years and much work to sort through those emotions have passed since then.  Joy and meaning have returned to my life. I am wiser, more compassionate, perhaps stronger, and certainly less arrogant about the degree of control I have over life.

Today, as a counselor, when I encounter new survivors, sometimes so raw with grief that they can barely say their name, my heart goes out to them and I always wish that I had a magic wand to make their pain disappear, but I don't.  What I can do is provide support and hope for the healing journey they must take.

In creating this web site, I have been blessed with the wisdom and companionship of many "veteran survivors" who share a similar commitment to new survivors. They too have gone through dark, painful times. They too have endured, persevered and come to know that there is light at the end.

My thoughts and prayers are with all who must make this journey.

Ronnie Walker, MS, LCPC